‘Let my prayer stand as incense before You;
the lifting of my hands as an afternoon offering.’
                                                        – Psalm 141:2

Dear Good Friends,

Thank you for waiting these several months to hear from me.
This has been an intense period with emotions and feeling ricocheting through my heart and soul like fireworks over an ocean of despair. I am sure you have been feeling the same way. Loneliness the number one malady of this modern age takes on a relevancy that we were not equipped for. Our loneliness becoming a slap in the face, an assault on our already frayed nervous system. How much more can we take before we surrender to the numb state of melancholy shock? These are the questions of the soul. And for all who are Jewish triply so.

As one who has dedicated my life to studying the spirit of Torah this past month and a half has revealed its truths through sorrow, disbelief, and grief. Here lays an accounting of my spiritual journey during Samadhi (a deep state of meditation where any sense of the body disappears, and one is floating in transcendence). Here is what I saw, what I experienced.

I looked into the tunnels, I listened to the wailing of parents, children and communities. I witnessed the misinformed and I walked through the destitute of war. I looked into the eyes of the golden Buddha hovering over the desert sunrise. I carried the spirits of the dead, their young bodies failed by bloodshed and rape; into the sun they sped, the souls escaping, quickly into the arms of the angels – over the land, God’s hand – wings like curtains descending. “No one must suffer, no soul will remember what they experienced on this horror day of holocaust,” God wept as he lifted the souls of the dead into heaven. Here the souls were placed in orbs of golden white light to heal their memory of the trauma. God informed me that the souls would stay here until they are ready to be taken back to the sacred garden, the home of all souls. God continued, “Never forget this day, for it is written in the Book of Life, as, The Day of Reckoning.”  God continued, “All will be tested, you have been shown what evil truly is.”

Horror breaks the bones. Fire once holy, now corrupted.
Jackals roaming. The sweetness of life torched. Creation’s beauty mangled. A distortion of truth rang on October 7th so loudly it shuddered all of humanity.

‘Each and every person will be given a choice between good and evil. This occurs in the heart. To love or to hate. To stand up and face evil, to say ‘no’, to evil. To work to stop evil from spreading. Fortify truth. Open your eyes and see clearly through the fog of distortion. This is not easy. It takes courage to walk down a path separate from those around you.’

‘Who will look? Who will see? Who will stand up against evil? Who will be counted as the righteous human? Who will stand strong, and not waver?’

Antisemitism is self-hatred. Antisemitism is an original sin for it is based on the ego’s (named Satan in the scriptures) desire to destroy the light, beauty, and mercy of God’s love. This is why evil preys on the innocent. Evil disdains joy, happiness, fun, family and friends. Evil is the construct and the pattern of God’s creation being ripped apart. Evil’s purpose is to destroy God.

Evil’s plan is to cause such suffering in God’s creations, people, animals, plants, water and air, that people turn on God, blame God and declare God does not exist. Those who choose not to see the evil right in front of them, those who choose to deflect the truth and lay blame on anything other than the evil acts evil commits become walking zombies, ghosts of their former selves, – for the light of their humanity has dimmed. These people are falling into the pit of evil’s snare. Psalm 140 and 141, Psalm 120 and 121, Psalm 91, each of these prophetic Psalms speak of this very thing.

God continues, ‘Who will comfort the victims? Who will hold my children as the world pummels its hate upon their open wounds? Every fiber of their being breaking apart. Their safety unraveling into the vast emptiness of an unknown future. So vast is this collective pain that only I your God can comprehend its magnitude. Therefore, I ask you to have mercy, have compassion, help out wherever you can. Who among you will do this?’

My observation, ‘Who beyond Israel mourns for the mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, grandparents, babies, sacrificed?’  Evil is a flesh-eating beast. Evil is mass sociopathy, a psychopathic killer without a soul. Evil is the pit of darkness that rejoices and finds ecstasy in death, murder and rape.
Will evil ever be satisfied? No, the beast will never be satisfied.
And so, we tremble. We ask, “Are we next?”  “Is the beast coming for our family?”  These are the very real questions that millions of people jew and non-jew are contemplating right now.

We all stand here in this moment of history. We are being asked, how do you love? How much compassion is in your heart? What have these events shown you about yourself? And can you listen deeper to the cries of the lonely?  And when you hear them, will you reach out, lend a hand, make a bridge to heal the impossible as only God can? Can you be God for a moment?

The first group of hostages have been freed. Prayers answered but hundreds more are still held hostage.

‘Use your prayers they are the swords of truth cutting away the chains of evil. You who have chosen goodness, you are My mercenaries, your thoughts create, your intense prayer creates miracles, now go create miracles of goodness and truth. Continue to hold the flame of goodness. Bless the holy land, Israel is your country too – She is and was decreed three thousand years ago to become the citadel of light to the world. It has been a painful journey for this mother. Love Her and She will never forget you. Her blessings will lift you. She is the light of hope.’

So, in my time of contemplation beneath the snowy covers of sorrow, God came holding his lamp of faith and hope saying these words. God came with a prayer of hope – never give up.

‘And know this, those who hold the light of truth will remain. The light of love will triumph. You may not see peace for a long time, but the day of peace is coming.’

So many children born and unborn are counting on us. We are being called. We are being asked to choose. What character are you made of? Do you choose to light the way, speak the truth, dispel the darkness, and lead? This is the time for all of us to become the deeper, wiser person.

Thank you for taking time to read and to hear.

All my love,

       ~Deirdre